TheAuthority Posted May 27, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted May 27, 2018 1 hour ago, chrisp65 said: Earlier today, whilst stood in a garage, surrounded by power tools, I laughed at just how loud I farted. That's got to be pretty close. Thanks for giving me a genuine lol!! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyh29 Posted May 27, 2018 Share Posted May 27, 2018 1 hour ago, chrisp65 said: Earlier today, whilst stood in a garage, surrounded by power tools, I laughed at just how loud I farted. That's got to be pretty close. my mate and I were travelling on a sleeper train one night and he dropped one ...the 2 strangers we were sharing the compartment with suddenly started gagging and one of them got out of his bunk and opened the door I spent the next 40 mins with my head under the blanket trying to muffle the sound of my laughter it’s funny how a fart can reduce people to fits of laughter ... well obvious not our 2 strangers 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sharkyvilla Posted May 28, 2018 Share Posted May 28, 2018 8 hours ago, tonyh29 said: my mate and I were travelling on a sleeper train one night and he dropped one ...the 2 strangers we were sharing the compartment with suddenly started gagging and one of them got out of his bunk and opened the door I spent the next 40 mins with my head under the blanket trying to muffle the sound of my laughter it’s funny how a fart can reduce people to fits of laughter ... well obvious not our 2 strangers It's the ones where an old person gets out of an armchair and with the effort they unexpectedly let out a fart that slays me. Also at dinner when a ketchup bottle does a raspberry. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted May 28, 2018 Share Posted May 28, 2018 14 hours ago, leighavfc said: The amount of "Essex boys" around these days. They all seem to LOVE themselves. Essex is full of them 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted May 28, 2018 Share Posted May 28, 2018 12 hours ago, tonyh29 said: my mate and I were travelling on a sleeper train one night and he dropped one ...the 2 strangers we were sharing the compartment with suddenly started gagging and one of them got out of his bunk and opened the door I spent the next 40 mins with my head under the blanket trying to muffle the sound of my laughter it’s funny how a fart can reduce people to fits of laughter ... well obvious not our 2 strangers Plus a massive overreaction from the 2 strangers! Unless your mate had toxic gas coming out of his arse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post mjmooney Posted May 28, 2018 VT Supporter Popular Post Share Posted May 28, 2018 (edited) Just blew out a pair of studio monitors. Playing a quietly recorded track, with the speaker volume turned up. Switched to a much louder track before remembering to turn down. Rookie error. Boom, woofers fecked. Just ordered a new set. Ah well, excuse to upgrade. EDIT: Don't tell the wife. Edited May 28, 2018 by mjmooney 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyh29 Posted May 28, 2018 Share Posted May 28, 2018 3 hours ago, Xela said: Plus a massive overreaction from the 2 strangers! Unless your mate had toxic gas coming out of his arse. It was pretty rank tbf 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StefanAVFC Posted May 28, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted May 28, 2018 I don't watch Britain's Got Talent or any of that shite but I'm at home and my parents had it on. A choir of women in WW2 women outfits singing patriotic songs waving British flags, bringing on war vets on at the end just made it into the final. Never seen post-Brexit visit summed up better tbh.. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maqroll Posted May 28, 2018 Share Posted May 28, 2018 Rock music from 1995-2000 They all sounded the same Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HanoiVillan Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 On 27/05/2018 at 20:02, tonyh29 said: That point on the plane where they serve you a black coffee so you rummage around in the litte plane food box and there in the plastic bag is a little spoon , sugar , and a little pouch of something that you assume is milk.....much to the cabin crews bemusement , turns out it was mayonnaise I poured in my coffee !! The word beginning with 'M' is the Russian for mayonnaise, pronounced 'may-nes' or something similar (realise you may have already worked this out ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Genie Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 I thought I’d be getting much less spam email after the new rules came into effect. Seems like I’m getting the same, if not more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyh29 Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 6 hours ago, HanoiVillan said: The word beginning with 'M' is the Russian for mayonnaise, pronounced 'may-nes' or something similar (realise you may have already worked this out ) Yeah , the more you look at the word it’s kinda obvious really ,will teach me to pay attention I suppose 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr_Pangloss Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 10 hours ago, StefanAVFC said: I don't watch Britain's Got Talent or any of that shite but I'm at home and my parents had it on. A choir of women in WW2 women outfits singing patriotic songs waving British flags, bringing on war vets on at the end just made it into the final. Never seen post-Brexit visit summed up better tbh.. Patriotism is a mental illness. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davkaus Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 On 27/05/2018 at 20:20, StefanAVFC said: Also why would a milk sachet have a flower on? I initially read this and thought "yeah". But...why would mayonnaise have a flower on? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NurembergVillan Posted May 29, 2018 Moderator Share Posted May 29, 2018 On 27/05/2018 at 20:02, tonyh29 said: That point on the plane where they serve you a black coffee so you rummage around in the litte plane food box and there in the plastic bag is a little spoon , sugar , and a little pouch of something that you assume is milk.....much to the cabin crews bemusement , turns out it was mayonnaise I poured in my coffee !! I was once sat next to an elderly lady on a flight to Bangkok. We were served drinks and a packet of biscuits. She chose orange juice. She took the biscuits from the packet and broke them into pieces, put them into her orange juice and stirred it all with her finger. I don't know what happened next. I looked away. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a m ole Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 People who think they're owed something. Flights are delayed at Stansted because lighting struck their refuelling system meaning no planes could be refuelled. https://news.sky.com/story/flights-delayed-after-lightning-strike-at-stansted-airport-11386800 Quote Emily Morgan told Sky News her flight to Ibiza with Ryanair, scheduled to depart at 8.45am, was still on the tarmac at 10.15am and said she did not get much information. She said: "We were due to take off at 8:45 but no information on when we will be refilled. The plane next to us was due to take off at 6:05 but is still sat there. "People are really cross that there was no information or warning of the delays at the airport and we were allowed to board knowing there was 3 hour plus delays. "The bar has been opened but been offered nothing complimentary." Wahhhh give me free stuff 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted May 29, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted May 29, 2018 13 minutes ago, Davkaus said: I initially read this and thought "yeah". But...why would mayonnaise have a flower on? Because it's made with sunflower oil? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davkaus Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 Olive oil, surely? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post PompeyVillan Posted May 29, 2018 Popular Post Share Posted May 29, 2018 1 hour ago, a m ole said: People who think they're owed something. Flights are delayed at Stansted because lighting struck their refuelling system meaning no planes could be refuelled. https://news.sky.com/story/flights-delayed-after-lightning-strike-at-stansted-airport-11386800 Wahhhh give me free stuff This brings me to another, when people treat customer service reps/waitresses etc like crap when they know they are not the root of the problem. Especially when they do it because they think they will get something for nothing. I don't know whether this happens a lot in other places, but seems common in the UK. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr_Pangloss Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 24 minutes ago, PompeyVillan said: This brings me to another, when people treat customer service reps/waitresses etc like crap when they know they are not the root of the problem. Especially when they do it because they think they will get something for nothing. I don't know whether this happens a lot in other places, but seems common in the UK. Happens a lot in America too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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