Xela Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 (edited) 19 hours ago, Shropshire Lad said: I knew as soon as I posted that, it would come back to bite me! Think I may have jumped the gun a bit in mentioning her to be honest. I've got her number and we're sporadically messaging each other. We've said we'll meet up over Christmas but not sure anything will come of it. Not picking up many romantic undertones. So these obstacles, is it a matter of timing then? It sounds like you're positive about it all but kinda bracing yourself for a fall. The obstacles are cultural/religious, which is a huge thing for her. We'll see what happens in due course. I like her and I'm hopeful that the feelings can prevail over the barriers. Edited December 14, 2015 by Xela Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 15 hours ago, Mantis said: Need some serious advice guys. Met up with this girl today who I met online. We got on really well, so much so in fact that we'd planned to go to this market/festival thing but ended up just talking in a coffee shop the entire afternoon because we got on so well. Anyway, she had to leave because she's a teacher and has to do a lot of work for her class but was really keen on meeting up again and suggested next Saturday. I was gonna suggest we meet up anyway but she seemed really keen. So yeah, we're meeting up again but what makes me a little bit disconcerted is that seemed quite distant physically, as in we didn't hug or anything at the end. I have very little experience of dating and relationships so could that just be a case of her wanting to take things slowly? As I said, we got on like a house on fire. Oh and for the record even she was basically taking the piss out of Villa... Don't worry about it, she;s agreed to meet you again so all is good. She was probably waiting for you to move in for a kiss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mantis Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 4 hours ago, zak said: I always have the same view as Stevo in this thread, and hes always quicker than me so i leave him to it most the time. "as in we didn't hug or anything at the end." I dont get this, obviously like a kiss, someone has to initiate a hug. So are you blaming her for neither of you initiating physical contact? If anything i would suggest it would be typical (whether sexist or not) that the guy would usually initiate contact in such a situation. Either way, her wanting to see you again and suggesting it, very much most likely means shes keen. She wouldnt have given you a date and time if she was just trying to be polite and would have just said "we should do this again (sometime/soon).." Nah I don't blame her, I think it just all happened really fast because we were both on the tube and she had to get off (inb4 jokes) at one stop while I was staying on until the next one. Might've been different if we'd left each other somewhere else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HanoiVillan Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 If you were expecting a hug or a kiss on public transport on a first date, I think you were being way too ambitious. My fiancee doesn't like public displays of affection and we've been together more than six years. You're overthinking it - at the end of the next date, hopefully somewhere other than the Tube, she'll make it obvious one way or the other. When the time comes, you'll just know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StefanAVFC Posted December 14, 2015 VT Supporter Share Posted December 14, 2015 If a girl isn't giving you a blowie in the middle of the tube after 1 date then she's not into you I'm afraid. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xann Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 6 hours ago, Demitri_C said: On a separate note has anyone dated any from their work? Rarely wise. Surely that's already been covered in this thread? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 1 hour ago, chrisp65 said: Junior Doctor, up to £47,000 p.a. Qualified GP salary £55,000 - £85,000 p.a. Consultant starting salary year 1 - £75,000 p.a. why she's re started texting now it turns out you're a doctor is an absolute mystery to me I dont get that impression she is after money mate, she has her own place, brought herself a flat in a very nice part of london. she seems very independent to me. My cousin also said that to me. she also said all those compliments before she found out my job 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mantis Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 28 minutes ago, HanoiVillan said: If you were expecting a hug or a kiss on public transport on a first date, I think you were being way too ambitious. My fiancee doesn't like public displays of affection and we've been together more than six years. You're overthinking it - at the end of the next date, hopefully somewhere other than the Tube, she'll make it obvious one way or the other. When the time comes, you'll just know. Didn't think of that actually. You're probably right, I just hope I do "know" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 3 hours ago, Xann said: Rarely wise. Surely that's already been covered in this thread? May have done but there is over 300 pages!! The girl I work with works in my old department so not directly linked and she works on a different site from me hence why i am considering it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PongRiddims Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 Rarely wise. Surely that's already been covered in this thread? May have done but there is over 300 pages!! The girl I work with works in my old department so not directly linked and she works on a different site from me hence why i am considering it Don't ever do it mate, honestly, I've done it twice officially and several times 'unofficially' (shall we say, had a mess) and it ends up the same way every time 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 Never shit on your own doorstep Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikeyp102 Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 Loads of people go out with people from work. As long as you don't let personal life affect work then it's fine, especially if they are in a different department and don't have to spend all day everyday together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 Yeah I went out with a girl at work back in 1988. Ended up married with three kids then divorced after nearly 20 years. Haha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugeley Villa Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 i cant ever see myself with anyone else but i bet everyone says that at some point then bang. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 I certainly did! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foreveryoung Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 I dated a girl from work, the typical one everybody wanted, was great at the time. She just seemed to have an amazing personality, also being 10 years younger than me (when I was 31) probably flattered me a bit. Cut a long story short, she had a bit of a shitty upbringing and was very black and white. Found out she suffered from bipolar, though would never admit it. She made her psychologist break down, was insane on drunken nights out, but still probably still the most amazing person I ever met, taught me big life experiences. She went from working a crap office job, to working in marketing for Microsoft Europe, then touring America, to a grey 3 months at Spearmint Rhino's, when she fell at a all time low. How it lasted 5 years I do not know, Guess it only ended too, cause we decided to leave it all an go live with her family in New Zealand, though at the last minute I bottled it. Crazy crazy times for me. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Albrighton Posted December 14, 2015 VT Supporter Share Posted December 14, 2015 I've mentioned it previously but I went out with a girl from work. Beautiful, sweet girl, about 8 years younger than me (I was 29 at the time). We worked in the same building, different departments. Lasted around 6 months, then she ditched me and it went sour. I found out a few months afterwards that she was seeing some other colleague, had to hear the news second hand from a mutual friend. Anyway I ended up leaving shortly after. Probably for the best, I was fed up of the work anyway. But it wasn't the best circumstances to leave under. Having said all that, I'm glad it all happened. Had some good memories and the bad stuff never seems as bad in retrospect. Depends how robust you are with your feelings and how attached you are to your job I guess. Not everyone is a complete wuss like me. Foreveryoung's experience with his girl beats mine. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HanoiVillan Posted December 15, 2015 Share Posted December 15, 2015 3 hours ago, foreveryoung said: I dated a girl from work, the typical one everybody wanted, was great at the time. She just seemed to have an amazing personality, also being 10 years younger than me (when I was 31) probably flattered me a bit. Cut a long story short, she had a bit of a shitty upbringing and was very black and white. Found out she suffered from bipolar, though would never admit it. She made her psychologist break down, was insane on drunken nights out, but still probably still the most amazing person I ever met, taught me big life experiences. She went from working a crap office job, to working in marketing for Microsoft Europe, then touring America, to a grey 3 months at Spearmint Rhino's, when she fell at a all time low. How it lasted 5 years I do not know, Guess it only ended too, cause we decided to leave it all an go live with her family in New Zealand, though at the last minute I bottled it. Crazy crazy times for me. This should be a movie. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted December 15, 2015 Share Posted December 15, 2015 9 hours ago, Shropshire Lad said: I've mentioned it previously but I went out with a girl from work. Beautiful, sweet girl, about 8 years younger than me (I was 29 at the time). We worked in the same building, different departments. Lasted around 6 months, then she ditched me and it went sour. I found out a few months afterwards that she was seeing some other colleague, had to hear the news second hand from a mutual friend. Anyway I ended up leaving shortly after. Probably for the best, I was fed up of the work anyway. But it wasn't the best circumstances to leave under. Having said all that, I'm glad it all happened. Had some good memories and the bad stuff never seems as bad in retrospect. Depends how robust you are with your feelings and how attached you are to your job I guess. Not everyone is a complete wuss like me. Foreveryoung's experience with his girl beats mine. The more I am thinking about it the more I think it may not be such a good idea...although she does know I was engaged but still seems keen so maybe she just wnats fun which would be perfect for me. I have to admit barring her, I am talking to two others as well. (one being the one i spoke about a page or so back) and this chick i been speaking to on facebook who i think is quite hot. dropped a few lines and she gave me her number without even asking 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted December 15, 2015 Share Posted December 15, 2015 10 hours ago, Demitri_C said: The more I am thinking about it the more I think it may not be such a good idea...although she does know I was engaged but still seems keen so maybe she just wnats fun which would be perfect for me. I have to admit barring her, I am talking to two others as well. (one being the one i spoke about a page or so back) and this chick i been speaking to on facebook who i think is quite hot. dropped a few lines and she gave me her number without even asking 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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