AVFC-Prideofbrum Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 Give a Japanese man a fish and he will eat for a day.Give him a fishing net and he might find his kids. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 That did make me laugh despite how harsh it is! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gingerlad Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 Give a Japanese man a fish and he will eat for a day.Give him a fishing net and he might find his kids. Hahaha, thats the best yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 My daughter came home from school in tears. I asked "What's the matter love?" She said "One of my teachers was arrested for abusing children today." I put my arm around her. "Did he do anything to you?" She shook her head "No." I asked "Then why are you crying?" She sobbed "Even the **** paedophiles aren't interested in me coz I'm ginger." I didn't know what to say to her, she had a point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 Got some sicki jokes coming up......... Bugger! My Tamogotchi just died of radiation poisoning Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 So it's that time again when all Irish people go out and get completely shit faced. 6 o clock. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 I just rung my Japanese friend to make sure he was okay after the Tsunami and all he did was go on about his social life. Just kept going on and on about a huge rave. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 I took my girlfriend Eileen to an orgy party last week, You should have seen the mess she was in when they started playing Dexy's midnight runners. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 My new telly is brilliant, it shows 50 frames per second. I managed to watch the whole of the snooker world championships in less than a minute. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 What's the worst way to start a sentence? Getting it up the wrong 'un in the showers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 I went to the zoo and a rhino tried to charge me. I told it to **** off. I'm not paying twice Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 Did you here about the Taxidermist who was mugged? He fought off his attacker with his bear hands. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Latvian, a Turk, an Aussie, a Yank, an Egyptian, a Jap, a Mexican, a Spaniard, a Greek, a Russian, an Estonian, a German, an Italian, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Swede, a Finn, an Israeli, a Romanian, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Czech, and a Swiss man walk into a pub. The landlord says, "I can't let you in without a Thai." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 I have a recurring dream where I divide 10 by 3. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 Scousers take everything seriously. No seriously, they take everything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 I was in a pub quiz the other day and my team, along with another, tied for first place. For the 'tie-breaker' we were asked one question, and the first person to shout the correct answer won it for their team. The question was as follows. 'In Paradise Lost, by John Milton, what was the Capital City of Hell?' No-one from either team knew the answer so both teams started shouting loudly and waving their arms in frustration at the question being too hard. Things got a bit heated and a fight broke out between one team captain and the quiz master. It was pandemonium. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 I broke up with my girlfriend after she lost an eye in car accident. "I had no idea you were so shallow," she said. "What the **** would you know? You don't have any depth perception." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 My girlfriend broke up with me yesterday because of my obsession. She said, "I'm sick of it. You actually believe that you're a Transformer. It's stupid. I've had enough and I'm leaving you." I said, "But, Baby, I can change." She said, "There you go again!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 I was in a nightclub queue when two blokes in front of me started arguing. One guy pushed the other and said, "Four, nine." The other man pushed him back and said, "Sixteen, twenty-five." A bouncer reached for his walkie-talkie and said, "I need some help at the door. We've got a couple of men squaring up." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonno_2004 Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 I think that is the longest succession of posts I've ever seen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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