Robtaylor200 Posted February 9, 2023 Share Posted February 9, 2023 (edited) When I first heard Julie Andrews sing Doh, Re, Me I thought She'll go far Edited February 9, 2023 by Robtaylor200 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Genie Posted February 9, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted February 9, 2023 My friend has a quality street stuck in his windpipe. The purple one? Yes that’s him. 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hobsons Choice Posted February 9, 2023 VT Supporter Share Posted February 9, 2023 On 10/01/2023 at 21:33, TreeVillan said: Nae rumour. My Scottish uncle used to tell this one: Did you hear about the Scotsman who dropped a penny? He bent down to pick it up and it hit him on the back of the head. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post mjmooney Posted February 12, 2023 VT Supporter Popular Post Share Posted February 12, 2023 Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don't notice when you replace words with random musical instruments. 3 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidcow Posted February 12, 2023 VT Supporter Share Posted February 12, 2023 8 minutes ago, mjmooney said: Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don't notice when you replace words with random musical instruments. Did you get that from the Public Recorder office? 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OutByEaster? Posted February 12, 2023 Moderator Share Posted February 12, 2023 11 minutes ago, mjmooney said: Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don't notice when you replace words with random musical instruments. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post sidcow Posted February 14, 2023 VT Supporter Popular Post Share Posted February 14, 2023 Bought the Mrs a special Valentines present today. A hot air balloon trip across America. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Tegis Posted February 15, 2023 VT Supporter Popular Post Share Posted February 15, 2023 What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4k? HDMI 4 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colhint Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 Murder she wrote Written by Yoda was it? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robtaylor200 Posted February 20, 2023 Share Posted February 20, 2023 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post colhint Posted February 20, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted February 20, 2023 I asked my 4 year old nephew if he knew how to say please in Spanish. He said he didn't. I think it's poor for four. 1 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted March 1, 2023 VT Supporter Share Posted March 1, 2023 The Funniest Joke of the Edinburgh Fringe award, back for the first time since 2019, is voted on by members of the public. West Bromwich comedian Masai Graham was the winner with this line: "I tried to steal spaghetti from the shop, but the female guard saw me and I couldn't get pasta." Fifty-two percent of the public surveyed voted it the best gag, according to local media. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post StefanAVFC Posted March 1, 2023 VT Supporter Popular Post Share Posted March 1, 2023 My 7 year old son came in from school today and asked me: "Dad, what kind of mouse can walk on 2 legs?" "Erm, I don't know" I replied "Mickey Mouse" he replied laughing "Dad, what kind of duck can walk on 2 legs" "Donald Duck" I replied "No, all ducks you idiot" 4 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted March 1, 2023 VT Supporter Share Posted March 1, 2023 8 minutes ago, StefanAVFC said: My 7 year old son came in from school today and asked me: "Dad, what kind of mouse can walk on 2 legs?" "Erm, I don't know" I replied "Mickey Mouse" he replied laughing "Dad, what kind of duck can walk on 2 legs" "Donald Duck" I replied "No, all ducks you idiot" Actually, that's rather good for a seven year old! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Genie Posted March 1, 2023 Share Posted March 1, 2023 I went to Anne Summers to get my wife some sexy underwear. I said to the sales lady “are these knickers satin?” She said “no, they’re brand new”. 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Mark Albrighton Posted March 2, 2023 VT Supporter Popular Post Share Posted March 2, 2023 11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TreeVillan Posted March 4, 2023 Share Posted March 4, 2023 On 01/03/2023 at 15:26, mjmooney said: Actually, that's rather good for a seven year old! But poor for four. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted March 23, 2023 VT Supporter Share Posted March 23, 2023 6 hours ago, robby b said: Hey I thought there was a jokes thread but I can't find it. Grr! (What a joke!) So I'll put my joke here... Why did the rabbit win the Nobel Prize? Would be better without the punchline. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robby b Posted March 23, 2023 Share Posted March 23, 2023 Why did the rabbit win the Nobel prize? Because it was out standing in its field. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChristchurchVillan Posted March 23, 2023 Share Posted March 23, 2023 1 hour ago, robby b said: Why did the rabbit win the Nobel prize? Because it was out standing in its field. Think it's normally a scarecrow for that one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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