rjw63 Posted March 15, 2022 Share Posted March 15, 2022 @leemond2008 Only one thing for it, mate! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maqroll Posted March 15, 2022 Share Posted March 15, 2022 I'm sort of a recluse by nature. But I've become convinced that one of the best ways to help with depression or social anxiety is to stay around people. Keep yourself engaged with goings on. Keep plugged in to a group or more. Keep busy with a regular routine. Opportunities unlock and might lead to really positive things. You'll have less time to worry about the what ifs. Less time to ruminate on past traumas or whatever weighs you down. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KentVillan Posted March 15, 2022 Share Posted March 15, 2022 I’m struggling a bit at the moment. Am living quite a healthy life, eating well, doing plenty of exercise, keeping off the drink about 4 nights a week, work going well. But get this feeling of emptiness during the week when I’m by myself and done with work for the day. Nowhere near as bad as what others have described in here, but it’s bothering me because I know in the past I’ve dealt with it with drink and drugs, and I know that just makes life worse in the long run. It clears when I wake up and have a coffee and get on with work… but it’s kind of a recurring theme in the evenings at the moment. Russia situation not helping either, feel like I can’t read a book or watch a film because I’m so sucked into the news. Anyway, open to ideas! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rds1983 Posted March 16, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted March 16, 2022 9 hours ago, KentVillan said: I’m struggling a bit at the moment. Am living quite a healthy life, eating well, doing plenty of exercise, keeping off the drink about 4 nights a week, work going well. But get this feeling of emptiness during the week when I’m by myself and done with work for the day. Nowhere near as bad as what others have described in here, but it’s bothering me because I know in the past I’ve dealt with it with drink and drugs, and I know that just makes life worse in the long run. It clears when I wake up and have a coffee and get on with work… but it’s kind of a recurring theme in the evenings at the moment. Russia situation not helping either, feel like I can’t read a book or watch a film because I’m so sucked into the news. Anyway, open to ideas! As @maqroll says above try getting out and socialising in some way. Keep yourself busy. Talking to people helps, even if it's just with strangers on here. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leighavfc Posted May 1, 2022 Share Posted May 1, 2022 On 15/03/2022 at 20:33, KentVillan said: I’m struggling a bit at the moment. Am living quite a healthy life, eating well, doing plenty of exercise, keeping off the drink about 4 nights a week, work going well. But get this feeling of emptiness during the week when I’m by myself and done with work for the day. Nowhere near as bad as what others have described in here, but it’s bothering me because I know in the past I’ve dealt with it with drink and drugs, and I know that just makes life worse in the long run. It clears when I wake up and have a coffee and get on with work… but it’s kind of a recurring theme in the evenings at the moment. Russia situation not helping either, feel like I can’t read a book or watch a film because I’m so sucked into the news. Anyway, open to ideas! Sending you some love brother @KentVillan hope you are in a better place than when you was when you posted this. I am struggling also at the minute and have really nosedived this last week also. I have no suggestions on how to get through it either but if a chat helps you know where I am 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leighavfc Posted May 1, 2022 Share Posted May 1, 2022 On 08/03/2022 at 18:30, Chindie said: I've had a load of thoughts recently. I'm struggling with my usual issues and thinking about where I'm headed. I don't think I can live a normal life and do the things I want to because of this, it's incompatible with life. And therefore I'm just existing, with a meaningless and empty life. Which leads to pretty obvious ends, eventually. This is how I feel too.. I'm just empty. The one thing in life that usually helps is football for me but in all honesty I'm not even bothered one bit about that at the moment either. I just walk around in a bubble all day, I can put a face on for a bit in certain situations but even that is wearing thin. I've sat at a family meal today and just stared into space without talking to anyone for the majority of it which really isn't me even if having a bad day. Im here for a chat if that ever helps you, I can only chat on here to complete strangers but it does help me and if it helps you, your welcome to message me anytime brother, I'm sure it will help us both 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
choffer Posted May 1, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted May 1, 2022 29 minutes ago, leighavfc said: This is how I feel too.. I'm just empty. The one thing in life that usually helps is football for me but in all honesty I'm not even bothered one bit about that at the moment either. I just walk around in a bubble all day, I can put a face on for a bit in certain situations but even that is wearing thin. I've sat at a family meal today and just stared into space without talking to anyone for the majority of it which really isn't me even if having a bad day. Im here for a chat if that ever helps you, I can only chat on here to complete strangers but it does help me and if it helps you, your welcome to message me anytime brother, I'm sure it will help us both Could have written exactly this today myself. Solidarity, with those of you who are in the darkness today. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maqroll Posted May 1, 2022 Share Posted May 1, 2022 Keep battling, Villans. Start small. Small victories add up. Keep things moving. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post El Zen Posted May 12, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted May 12, 2022 (edited) These last two months have been a really tough time for me, as many will be aware. But it has also given me confirmation that my fundamental mental health is in very good shape. In spite of all the f***ing crap I’ve had to endure, I am still able to function pretty normally. I enjoy my work, hang out with mates (more important than ever), laugh at a good joke, enjoy good food and drink, maintain my hobbies and interests, work out, go to the football. I am still an optimist, I still fundamentally think life is good, I still think I’m a good person who deserves good things and wants to do good for others, I’m still a good dad. I can see that while my life is pretty shit right now, it won’t be forever. I guess I’m just grateful for whatever it is that has me wired in such a way as to withstand all the crap I’ve had to deal with and not want to just lay down and give up. I’m thinking it must be part core personality traits, part the quality of my other close relationships (family, close friends). I also did a couple of sessions of therapy, and while I do think I would have got on okay without, I’m glad I did and I might go back at some point if I feel like I need it. I also think choosing to be fairly open about what I’m going through whenever I can has been immensly helpful. Just talking about it really helps getting my head right. Onwards and upwards. Edited May 12, 2022 by El Zen 17 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Zen Posted May 13, 2022 Share Posted May 13, 2022 That being said, it’s my birthday today, and I’m not really enjoying it very much. Very melancholy. I suppose that’s the thing, though. I can be melancholy and still find bright spots. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted May 13, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted May 13, 2022 5 minutes ago, El Zen said: That being said, it’s my birthday today, and I’m not really enjoying it very much. Very melancholy. I suppose that’s the thing, though. I can be melancholy and still find bright spots. Happy Birthday, anyway! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davkaus Posted May 13, 2022 Share Posted May 13, 2022 You'd not be human if you weren't having moments of sadness with the things you've been through lately, but if you're still finding enjoyment and happiness, you're on the right track I'd say. Have a good un! Got any plans to celebrate tonight? 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anthony Posted May 13, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted May 13, 2022 36 minutes ago, El Zen said: That being said, it’s my birthday today, and I’m not really enjoying it very much. Very melancholy. I suppose that’s the thing, though. I can be melancholy and still find bright spots. Happy birthday Mr Zen. Rooting for you. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Zen Posted May 13, 2022 Share Posted May 13, 2022 57 minutes ago, Davkaus said: You'd not be human if you weren't having moments of sadness with the things you've been through lately, but if you're still finding enjoyment and happiness, you're on the right track I'd say. Have a good un! Got any plans to celebrate tonight? Yeah, that’s what I’m thinking too. Tonight will be fairly quiet, just have some pizza and cake with my son, but I’m going out with a bunch of colleagues tomorrow, so that will deputise as my birthday party. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rds1983 Posted May 13, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted May 13, 2022 17 minutes ago, El Zen said: Yeah, that’s what I’m thinking too. Tonight will be fairly quiet, just have some pizza and cake with my son, but I’m going out with a bunch of colleagues tomorrow, so that will deputise as my birthday party. Have a good one bud. Happy birthday. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sharkyvilla Posted May 13, 2022 Share Posted May 13, 2022 I've struggled more and more as the weeks have gone by, largely due to nightshift work and getting more and more lonely. If I'm lucky I socialise once a fortnight at the moment. I've got a job interview at Gatwick Airport on Monday so hopefully that will sort me out a bit. I also started going to the gym in September and any day I don’t go I just feel like utter shit mentally. I'm not sure if that's normal with the endorphins and whatnot. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A'Villan Posted May 13, 2022 Share Posted May 13, 2022 It's looking like I will be appointed the chair of the mental health advisory board for Melbourne's biggest public healthcare provider. I'm so, so excited, hence the post. This is an aspect of life I am so passionate and driven to understand and be of service in, because you wouldn't believe what I've been through, unless we were to discuss it in the context of me being a total nutjob fruitloop. It's probably not appropriate for me to be online airing the ins and outs, or even what I've stated already just now in regards to the work I do. This forum means a lot to me though and so I wanted to share some good news. I've come a long f***ing way. And that's not something I'm proud of. Seriously. It might seem like I'm here to boast or boost my ego with what I'm sharing, I can't speak for how others view me. I know what's in my heart though and it's just a firm message to say to all of us who are going through some difficulties and challenges, that are proving to be more than you had in mind for yourself, and that are overwhelming and bringing us down. You matter. Your life has meaning and purpose. I know it can be hard to fathom when societal dogma tells you otherwise, and eventually we are in an environment that erodes our vitality, peace of mind, and even can turn our own heart to doubt. Be careful what we allow others to tell us is in our own best interest, because the very notion suggests that we are unable to determine that for ourselves. Okay this could easily turn into, if it hasn't already, a rant that the forum doesn't appreciate. Thanks to everyone in this thread brave enough to share. It takes a strong person to air their vulnerabilities. Equally thank you to everyone lending a pair of eyes and reading through what we are experiencing, even if you aren't commenting, just by acknowledging these matters in one's own mind, we raise awareness and we then feel in our hearts the increasing importance of how we treat ourselves and those around us. The world around us. Even if we deny those feelings, they are there, and they will be until we are ready to face them. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A'Villan Posted May 13, 2022 Share Posted May 13, 2022 My psychologist gave me a gem. He is a gem himself. Thankfully he's not as long winded and verbose as me when I get going. "The distinction between processing trauma, and thoughts spiralling." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rds1983 Posted May 13, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted May 13, 2022 1 hour ago, sharkyvilla said: I've struggled more and more as the weeks have gone by, largely due to nightshift work and getting more and more lonely. If I'm lucky I socialise once a fortnight at the moment. I've got a job interview at Gatwick Airport on Monday so hopefully that will sort me out a bit. I also started going to the gym in September and any day I don’t go I just feel like utter shit mentally. I'm not sure if that's normal with the endorphins and whatnot. Exercise and going to the gym makes a massive difference to my mental health and wellbeing. My mood instantly lifts and I can feel the stuff bogging me down just disappear when I stop. I've been diagnosed clinically depressed with extreme anxiety in the past and weightlifting and cardio is one of my main coping mechanisms. It's also probably the only long term healthy one. When I've not been for a few days I can tell the difference in my mood and if I'm injured and I've not been for a few months my wife says I'm insufferable. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A'Villan Posted May 13, 2022 Share Posted May 13, 2022 15 minutes ago, Rds1983 said: Exercise and going to the gym makes a massive difference to my mental health and wellbeing. My mood instantly lifts and I can feel the stuff bogging me down just disappear when I stop. I've been diagnosed clinically depressed with extreme anxiety in the past and weightlifting and cardio is one of my main coping mechanisms. It's also probably the only long term healthy one. When I've not been for a few days I can tell the difference in my mood and if I'm injured and I've not been for a few months my wife says I'm insufferable. This is great advice and insight. Basketball might have saved my life. Support networks are great too. “The Iron never lies to you. You can walk outside and listen to all kinds of talk, get told that you’re a god or a total bastard. The Iron will always kick you the real deal. The Iron is the great reference point, the all-knowing perspective giver. Always there like a beacon in the pitch black. I have found the Iron to be my greatest friend. It never freaks out on me, never runs. Friends may come and go. But two hundred pounds is always two hundred pounds.” 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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