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tomzep

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Posts posted by tomzep

  1. When you stand up your cheeks automatically close a little thus squashing the poop into your bum mounds. Stay sitting , wrap the paper around your non masturbating hand like an oven glove and reach under from the front. Two good scoops should suffice and maybe a final spit polish at the end if you're in the mood.

    I sort of remain squatted as I step away and lean forward a little

  2. I also get off the toilet when I wipe my arse, the sitting technique is far too dangerous

    What's likely to happen? You afraid you'll fall in?

    My hand may come in to contact with the toilet, and also far too close to my own shit. I'd prefer to step slightly away from the toilet and wipe at a safe distance

    Slightly mental I know. I had a fear of falling in the toilet when I was little, I used to obsese about putting the seat down

  3. Trekka loving the Boss in your sig

    in honour of that:

    absolutely epic

    Thanks :)

    The boss is brilliant. Did you see his stint in Glastonbury? He rocked the place!

    na my sister went and said he totally stole the show. So jealous :cry:

    Saw him at Glasto, one of the best moments of my life!

    Watch this video where hes doing working ona sunny day, Im the lad in the cap who grabs him, kisses and licks him and pulls him into the crowd at about 4 mins 15! Was all over the BBC, all my mates saw it at home!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sS687iMrUvM

  4. My mate did this in the summer. Ive seen a bit of Europe but inter railing sounds great. His top tip was get long distance overnight trains, sleep on them and save on hostels. He made some strange journeys which didnt seem to be in a logical order of visiting cities but the sleeper trains saved him a fortune

  5. Not being able to distinguish between conversations in dreams and conversations in real life

    I get this a lot. To take it further, when I'm in conversation with someone and think of something to say, moments later I can't remember if I've already said it or not. Sometimes I've already said it and they look at me like I'm insane, other times by the time I've concluded that I haven't said it the converastion has move on and it doesn't matter.

    I'm just like this. I find myself preceding things I say with "Erm, have I already asked you..." or "have I already said...", although most of the time I just don't bother because I'm not sure.

    This thread got good all of a sudden. I have gotten the fear of repeating thing. The worst is the paranoia afterwards when I'll convince myself I've just told the same story twice in the space of a minute and the people I've told are just tolerating me in a kind of pitying way.

    When I get an idea of something to say in company, but I don't say it, I can't think of anything else to say until I say the first thing. Then I can get back to listening to what other people are saying and contributing with something else. It's why after a conversation has moved on, I'll come out with a statement that relates to something that has been long since discussed.

    It's bloody annoying.

    It also annoys me that I haven't laughed skittishly like paul rudd and jason segel since 2008, as far as I remember.

    You posted this 3 pages back

  6. Fine thanks, changing chords just seems impossible. How do you practice that anyway? Doesn't seem possible... :lol:

    One thing i found that helped when i was setting out was to learn the chords i needed for a song but then play along to the song with headphones on. It stops you hearing the shit youre probably playing and doesnt knock your confidence whilst giving you practice with the shapes and movements

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